I am a huge fan of Andrew Stone. He first popped up on the Sky One ‘documentary’ series Pineapple Dance Studios. It was a vehicle designed to launch Louis Spence into the mainstream, and in that respect it was successful. But for me, Stone was the real star. At first I was laughing at him, but as the show progressed, I began to see there was more to this man, a kind of sadness. He was desperate to make it, maybe too desperate, and I felt for him. I could see how important being a ‘star’ meant to him, and it was quite apparent he was never going to make it on his terms.

But, he has made it in some sense. He was recently on Celebrity Big Brother. Sure, he got kicked out first, but the fact he was asked means he has earned his place in British popular culture.

I’ve met him a few times, and while his eyes are constantly darting over your shoulder to see if there is someone behind you who can help further his career, I liked him. In fact, there is nothing wrong with that. If I’d had that attitude, maybe I wouldn’t be sat in my spare room now writing a ‘blog about Andrew Stone. Maybe I’d actually be working. How’s about them apples?

Yesterday, after being in the This Morning green room, and splicing a conversation I was having with someone (it was about Andrew) and overhearing a chance comment (‘I watched Romancing the Stone last night’) I came up with a fun game for Twitter. Let’s make up shows for Andrew Stone. My first one was of course, Romancing the Stone, where several girls take Andrew Stone out for dinner. The winner DOESN’T get to sleep with him.

I thought that would be that, but it turns out you were all up for a laugh as well and I had hundreds of replies. Some f them were absolutely hilarious and had me laughing out loud. I thought it only fair to share them with you as some of you eejots aren’t on Twitter! WTF! LOL. If you are, you can follow me on @iainlee

But I digress. Here are my favourite shows for Andrew Stone.



rop86 Geoff Crepes

@Iainlee “stone the crows” Andrew stone just hangs around with some crows innit #andrewstone



EllieJaneTaylor Ellie Taylor

@iainlee Stone Age. People guess Andrew Stone’s non-showbiz age #AndrewStone



MrAdamDolan Adam Dolan

@iainlee ‘Stoned’ – people throw stones at Andrew Stone. (Probably not much potential for a second season…or episode even). #Andrewstone



iainlee Iain Lee

Stone Alone – Andrews parents go away for Christmas and leave him at home to fight tiny burglars #andrewstone




glitterkitty70 Mrs A

@iainlee I’m a latecomer to this but have we done Stone Roses? Andrew Stone scoffs Christmas chocs until he’s sick #AndrewStone




Leppmix Andy Given

@iainlee Andrew’s Stone deaf. Andrew Stone runs a school for deaf kids and teaches them to sing. so many schananagans #andrewstone



paulclare Paul Clare


@iainlee Skipping Stone – Andrew is routinely overlooked for a multitude of roles and jobs #AndrewStone



stuartheron Stuart Heron

@iainlee (a retro one) Stone Mill – The new, bigger replacement for BBCs ‘Pebble Mill At One’ chat show with #andrewstone



mikeynma Michael Law

@iainlee Sly and the Family Stone – Sylvester Stallone stays with Andrew Stone’s family with hilarious results #andrewstone



EllisD666 Damien Ellis

@iainlee Harder than Stone- contestants take turns in proving they’re tougher than Stone by taking it in turns to beat him. #andrewstone



clairefarmer Claire Farmer

@iainlee Stone walling – #andrewstone is attached to a crane and contestants have to swing him into Walls, as if he were a wrecking ball



berkneemooler berkneemooler

@iainlee Stone cold sober: he’s wearing a variety of knitted garments swigging lemonade on a park bench?! #AndrewStone



mikeynma Michael Law

@iainlee Stone’s Moan – people kick him in the crotch and watch the results: running time 6 weeks #andrewstone



HillyFoz Hilly

. @iainlee St’one: Andrew is canonised. #andrewstone



missmagik claire

@iainlee ‘theres no place like stone’ #andrewstone stays in various peoples homes but always returns to his actual home



kdjukes Keith Jukes

@iainlee Sticks and Stone. #andrewstone is forced to live alone in the Australian Outback. Please let this happen.



redjamietaylor jamie edwards-taylor

@iainlee paper, scissors, stone, Andrew Has to play the iconic game against various warlords and if he loses he dies! #AndrewStone



MrAdamDolan Adam Dolan

@iainlee Glass Houses.Andrew Stone lives in a glass house,and we all watch through the wall as two large men shove him around. #Andrewstone


jayde1983 John Davies

@iainlee Stone, Stone and Stone. Oliver, Sharon and Andrew Stone take a walk round the Norfolk Broads. #andrewstone



dammydodger Damon Gray

@iainlee “Stoned to Death” – Live or die game, #andrewstone throws himself into people with the intent to harm.




rop86 Geoff Crepes

@iainlee ‘blood out of a stone’ #andrewstone gives blood with hilarious consequences



linopolis Lino

@iainlee Stonely the Lonely. We put Andrew Stone on a deserted island. That’s it, no cameras, we just get rid of him. #AndrewStone


teemccarron Tom

@iainlee ‘Cast the First Stone’- Andrew Stone attempts to find the perfect baby to play himself in his own upcoming biopic #AndrewStone



DaveDogFacedBoy AKA funkygibbon

@iainlee ‘A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss’ #andrewstone disguised as Mick Jagger for a month and tries to ensnare stick thin models



mikeynma Michael Law

@iainlee Stone Faced – Members of the public have plastic surgery to look like Andrew to win free counseling afterwards #andrewstone



NickJSav Nick S

AStonement – A romantic wartime drama #andrewstone




@iainlee Stoned Stone Stoned. Reality show to see how long Andrew Stone can openly smoke cannabis in an Irani market place. #andrewstone



jallford Jonathan Allford

@iainlee ‘The Rock and the Stone’ Andrew Stone is tutored by Dwayne Johnson in the art of wrestling. #andrewstone



Woodseh2003 Stuart Wood

@iainlee Stoned – the public vote from a choice of ‘mystery’ drugs to be tested on #andrewstone. Some of the drugs being lethal.


RubbishUsrname harvey colvey

@iainlee paper mache pigs can be used if cleared with angry birds developers.Crows used if done on a low budget & shown on ch 5 #andrewstone


lowster1985 Robin Low

@iainlee Steppingstone. #andrewstone goes around the country stepping on young children’s sandcastles.



stuartheron Stuart Heron

@iainlee Stone The Crows – #AndrewStone in a room with some hungry crows, what happens next will have you laughing for weeks!


dammydodger Damon Gray

@iainlee “Stone Henge” #andrewstone is put into positions by contestants, the winner gets to leave him in a field next to a random motorway.



Tigermilk20 Pug Jordan

The Stone Roses – #andrewstone replaces Ian Brown for the Heaton Park gigs so he can belt out ‘I wanna be adored’



adinho85 The Adam Painter

@IainLee – Queens of the Stone age. Need I say any more?


GuyHerbert Guy Herbert

@iainlee Getting Blood From A Stone. #doeswhatitsaysonthetin No, honestly, this is my last one. #andrewstone



karnegie karnegie

@amandahbowen: @iainlee laugh at him, not with him. #andrewstone”< harsh but fair Amanda!!


ricardoyorks Richard Anderson

@iainlee ‘No Stone Unturned’ Andrew Stone re-opens investigations into unsolved murders from the 19th century #andrewstone



amandahbowen amanda bowen

@iainlee laugh at him, not with him. #andrewstone



mikeynma Michael Law

@iainlee iStone – Andrew invests in an app that shows levels of self delusion #andrewstone



HillyFoz Hilly

.@iainlee ‘Heart Like A Stone’: Andrew walks around town centres wearing an appropriate ‘I❤[insert name of town here]’ t-shirt #andrewstone



DoeyLadd Anthony Doe

@MutedPenguin @iainlee surely whoever stuck the sword in Andrew has a greater claim the the realm? #andrewstone



jayde1983 John Davies

@iainlee Stepping Stone. Andrew Stone walks further and further away from people until he far, far away. #andrewstone



RubbishUsrname harvey colven

@iainlee stone the crows. Combining uks fave celeb and fave iphone game. Fire andrew from a cannon at paper mache crows #andrewstone



sman3d Steven Manfredi

@iainlee Stone Cold Sober – Andrew Stone spends January sleeping rough in the doorway of an abandoned pub #AndrewStone



Jimbold James Driver

@iainlee Sly & The Family Stone – Andrew and parents spend time with Stallone learning how to shoot & box #andrewstone



stuartheron Stuart Heron

@iainlee Stone Cold – We send #andrewstone off to the North Pole… and leave him there.


johnfromsoho John Hamilton

@iainlee Rolling Stone – Andrew Stone is put in sleeping bag & pushed down a hill #andrewstone


mikeynma Michael Law

@ianlee A Stone’s Throw Away – Andrew has a bit of a tidy up with special guest Bobby Ball #andrewstone



MutedPenguin MutedPenguin

@iainlee “Sword in the Stone”- #andrewstone is killed. Whoever finds his body & removes the sword…becomes the King of England.



Dan__Kelly Dan Kelly

@iainlee #AndrewStone StoneCone: put traffic cones over 100 peoples heads. Person who finds Andrew Stone wins a curly wurly



porcpuff Andy

@iainlee “Stone-the-crows”. Using the old saying as a starter, people bet on how many crows Andrew can stone in a minute. #andrewstone



jallford Jonathan Allford

@iainlee ‘Sword in the Stone’ Andrew Stone attends and is forcefully ejected from a renaissance fair. #andrewstone



Nut_E1 Kevin Duke

@iainlee Andy Pandy, everyone has to pander to Andrew Stone’s needs #andrewstone



GuyHerbert Guy Herbert

@iainlee Bill Two Kurds With One Stone – Andrew Stone travels to the Middle East with descendants of Rev. Spooner and ermmm… #andrewstone



stuartheron Stuart Heron

@iainlee Stone Deaf – A show watched entirtely on mute so we dont have to listen to #andrewstone



iainlee Iain Lee

Stone Tossing – contestants try to skim Andrew Stone across the sea as many times as they can while he masturbates #andrewstone


linopolis Lino

@iainlee “Stony Broke” Kidnap Stone, strip him of all his money and leave him on the Isle of Wight. No-one sleeps with him. #AndrewStone



HillyFoz Hilly

@iainlee ‘Stonehenge’: Andrew builds a henge. #andrewstone



The_Gary_Show Gary Gatford Redrup

@iainlee Stone Walled – Andrew visits famous Walls around the world and performs on them to end the show #andrewstone



GapYah Orland0

@iainlee Give the dog a Stone. Andrew Stone learns to survive being caged with a series of dangerous canines. #AndrewStone



GuyHerbert Guy Herbert

@iainlee Kill Two Birds With One…oh no. Hang on. Maybe not. #andrewstone


maplintweet Maplin Electronics

@iainlee Stone the Crows – Andrew looks into the history of scarecrow making #andrewstone



bruceleckenby Bruce Leckenby

@iainlee “Written in Stone” – people write abuse on Andrew Stone. Audience watches. #andrewstone



rop86 Geoff Crepes

@iainlee ‘stone on the phone’ Andrew hosts a babestation style show with him as the only option to talk to #AndrewStone



HillyFoz Hilly

.@iainlee ‘Stone the Crows’: Andrew throws rocks at members of the corvus family. #andrewstone



GuyHerbert Guy Herbert

@iainlee Rosetta Stone – cookery show. A woman called Rose munches her way through The Stone Family (also see Sly & The…) #andrewstone



mikeynma Michael Law

Stars in the Wars: Attack of the Stones – Andrew goes into hospital in this Fly on the wall documentary about Gallstones #andrewstone


vickybrown_ Vicky brown

@iainlee andrew stoned- Andrew gets stones lashed at him #andrewstone



AllDesignPrint Simon Hall

@iainlee “Sword In The Stone” Surgeons try to remove a large sword from his abdomen, on live TV. #andrewstone



Pondelicious Sarah Ponder

@iainlee Stone Baked. Andrew Stone does 48 hours on a sun bed for charity. #andrewstone


EllieJaneTaylor Ellie Taylor

@iainlee Sword in the Stone. A documentary where Andrew learns about different medieval pastimes #AndrewStone


vickybrown_ Vicky brown

@iainlee romancing the stone- members of the public try to romance Andrew #andrewstone


linopolis Lino

@iainlee “Stone’s Ginger Whine” Andrew Stone taunts ginger people till they can take no more. None of them sleep with him. #AndrewStone



rop86 Geoff Crepes

@iainlee ‘Andrew (wears) Stone Island’ Andrew wears the clothing brand and talks to other wearers who are mostly football thugs #andrewstone



GuyHerbert Guy Herbert

@iainlee Stone: The Crow – Andrew Stone stars in the remake of the 90s gothic classic. #andrewstone


linopolis Lino

@iainlee “Stone Me!”, Andrew Stone goes to Iran to commit crimes that carry a punishment of stoning, might not run as a series. #AndrewStone



wildfruit2 wildfruit

@iainlee every little stone helps …. Andrew stone realises he has no talent and goes to work at tescos #andrewstone



mark_random Mark Random


@iainlee No Stone Unturned. Andrew Stone is a hard-nosed private detective. Louis Spence is the comic relief sidekick. #andrewstone


mikeynma Michael Law

@iainlee – Give a Dog a Stone – Andrew is put through his paces by a dog handling team #andrewstone



evilnoodle Jenni Block

@iainlee Stone the Crows. Andrew Stone has to create interpretive dance to the entire Counting Crows back catalogue #AndrewStone


nonymouse G_Austen

@iainlee Sticks and Stones – A nature documentary of #AndrewStone walking us through and arboretum



ComedyBint ComedyBint

@iainlee The Rolling Stone: We roll a massive boulder over Andrew for a week until he resembles a flat cartoon character… #andrewstone


robinpeyton Robin Peyton

@iainlee ‘no stone unturned’ – Andrew travels the UK trying to turn all men with the surname ‘Stone’ gay. #AndrewStone



Jenny_Tillwart Dr Lukes

@iainlee Stoneaway. Andy befriends a Yank playboy and falls asleep in his car which winds up on a ship headed for the States. #AndrewStone



manwithstick Mark Denton

@iainlee Stone the Crows. Andrew spends time with Sheryl and Russell. Fun ensues. #andrewstone


DanInLeeds Dan Earney

@iainlee ‘Stone Deaf’. After being resigned to a minor record label,Andrew requires singing lessons. Follow him on his journey. #AndrewStone


robinpeyton Robin Peyton

@iainlee ‘Sink like a Stone’- Andrew runs a kitchen shop where every sink is shaped like him, mentored by Mary Portas #AndrewStone


linopolis Lino

@iainlee “Stonly Ewe” female sheep are paraded in front of a gloating Stone, he can choose only one, it doesn’t sleep with him. #AndrewStone


j0annepsi Jo

@iainlee “Stone the crows” – Andrew Stone becomes the new frontman of US band Counting Crows #AndrewStone


HillyFoz Hilly

.@iainlee ‘Glass Houses’: People who live in greenhouses have to throw Andrew through them. #andrewstone


mikeynma Michael Law

@iainlee Between a Stone and a Hard Place – Andrew goes all Ross Kemp and visits war torn places and talks to people #andrewstone


robinpeyton Robin Peyton

@iainlee ‘Heart of Stone’ – the entire Heart FM radio network has to be creatively controlled by Andrew Stone #AndrewStone

robinpeyton Robin Peyton

@iainlee ‘Blood out of a Stone’ – Andrew has to continuously give blood with contestants guessing how long till he dies #AndrewStone



mikeynma Michael Law

@iainlee Sink Like a Stone – Andrew gives career advice to youngsters wanting to enter showbiz #andrewstone


Robinpeyton Robin Peyton

@iainlee ‘Stone Cold’ – Andrew takes contestants on to see how long they can stand naked in a meat freezer without shivering #AndrewStone


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